February 14, 2022

Hello Everyone and Happy Valentine's Day!

We've got a LOT to cover in this letter but first, welcome to all of the new subscribers from the BOSLady website! There was a notification error on our Wix site so while you were receiving emails when the site was updated, you weren't added to this mailing list to receive the weekly love notes. That has officially been corrected :)

If you haven't registered yet, this is a reminder that the Lighting the Way: Advocacy + Action for Lighting Design event is March 3rd from 2-3pm PST. Registration is free.

We need a host and book for March so if anyone is interested, please send me an email directly.

The Weekly Three

1. Some things from last Tuesday's meeting: Thank you to Alexandra for hosting and for those who attended our February meeting on The Long Game. One of the main points of the book is that to achieve long term goals, we have to make short term sacrifices. The beginning of the book talks a lot about not being able to make long term plans because your brain is too occupied and frazzled in the present. Clark chalks that up to not wisely choosing what to spend your time and energy on, and gives very helpful lists to teach you how to remedy that. The action items that she gives are my favorite part of the book.

During our discussion, it was pointed out that there is a different reason for not being able to formulate long term plans. It's not always the case that the fried feeling brain is from lack of discernment. Right now, it can be from anxiety about the uncertainty of the present, especially for parents of young children in this COVID era. Uncertainty triggers the flight, fight or freeze response. So even if you're doing your best to choose what to spend your time on, it still might not be enough to play that long game right now. And that is okay.

2. Some things from the January 31st WILD: Rising for Social Change Q&A: What a rich session this was! Here are some of my favorite things shared by the panelists:

• Lyz Len's newsletter Why Men Yell At Me

• Code switching as a LGBTQ person, an article about this here. If you don't have your pronouns in your signature, know that it is a simple act that can make a huge difference

• Take opportunities that you don't feel qualified for. It takes you longer to grow if you stay stuck where you are

• Support initiatives that support women. Mentor and sponsor women if you have the chance

• Break out of the roles that women are typically limited and delegated to, then speak to younger children about it! Inspire and empower them early on

3. Something about Achieving Awareness vs. Awakened Awareness from Lisa Miller, PhD: I randomly selected an episode of Rich Roll podcast last week and it was an interview with Lisa Miller, PhD, who just published The Awakened Brain. In her book, she shares her studies that prove there are "physically identifiable differences in the brains of spiritually engaged vs. non-spiritually engaged people", specifically "broad and pervasive regions of cortical thickness that go hand in hand with a sustained spiritual awareness" (Gretchen Rubin). This cortical thickness is insulation from mental illness, most markedly depression. If you're not interested in spirituality, you can still benefit from her book's information about two types of awareness: achieving vs. awakened. Achieving awareness is very linear, goal oriented and single minded. Awakened is more open minded, allows you to notice more, take in more things and leaves you more able to "Quest,...a way of living in a dynamic relationship with life". Achieving awareness leaves you more open to opportunities because you don't have a narrow view. It also makes it easier when things don't go exactly as planned because you can see other doors, not just the one that got slammed in your face.

Thank you for reading!

Amber Watnik

(she/her)